Can’t We All Just Get Along?

Tags

being nice, communication, cooperation

Another interesting week on Lake Darling.  My return to town has been somewhat calming as life returns to what it was before all the travels, but the last few weeks of travel and amazement highlight the mundanity of the weeks back home.  It has been nice to catch up on some sleep, see Mom and Tom and the kitties, and get back to work at the bookstore.  Another weekend of work up at the Harn (another 4-day weekend) has increased my realization that the Harn is where I truly long to be.  There is a peace about this place.  As much as the hectic nature of our travel compares to a quieter life back in Alex, the Harn provides an even more peaceful place when compared to town life.  And it comes without the mundanity as there is always something to figure out at the Harn, something to build, or something to move… once again.  Life at the Harn is not so repetitive, outside of the moving things, but seemingly full of endless possibilities… for work!  It’s not an easier life. It is quite invigorating!  But it also offers less electronic distractions and a chance to slow down in many ways.

Many express concern to me as I discuss my upcoming transition to full-time Harn life noting how lonely I will be, how there aren’t enough activities and people to keep me entertained in the North Woods.  They lament that I will be “bored”.  But as much as there is quiet and solitude, there is a wood full of entertainment.  There are red squirrels chattering at me all day and coons twittering in the dark hours; an occasional deer caught off guard in the woods emitting a startled alien-like snort. There are bugs of all sorts scampering and frogs and toads jumping.  There are trees swaying and whispering as the winds rustle their leaves. Inside, there are boxes (many, many boxes) of books full of information and adventure to consume.  There is more time spent in porch sitting as we consume almost all our meals outside this time of year.  The cooking and cleaning take a bit more work with our limited resources and current need to carry water. There are also friends up here to visit and, yes, an occasional trip to town.  And coming home in the dark wondering if that was a bear you just heard keeps the heart pumping.  So, no, not boring at all!But will I be content moving out of civilization?  Interesting to contemplate considering what is currently happening in “civilization”.  There are endless battles in our world.

• People fighting for power and those in opposition who want more of the resources.
• There are those who want more development (often at taxpayer expense) and those who want to remain with the status quo.
• People of color that want equal rights to a public education and those who fear allowing them in the district will bring crime and violence. [Inspired by this past weekend’s This American Life – well worth the listen… http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/562/the-problem-we-all-live-with]
• Parents who fear for their daughters’ reputations and girls who want to express themselves. [Circumstances and hindsight will determine who is correct in their stance.]
• People who want HRC for President and those who want her in jail.
• People fighting for an oil pipeline to transport Bakkan oil and people standing for the purity of the water that a leaky pipeline would destroy.

Just to mention a few.

In the current political race, it seems there has been less civility than ever.  But, like crime, is civility actually at an all-time high apex?  Is it truly that we live in a world where people are more polite, more compassionate than ever? Is it just the non-stop, instantaneous possibility for information that makes it feel like there is so much more strife?  Or are we just being more open-minded, accepting everything as it is and allowing it to be in the open for all to see (and judge)?  This reminds me of a favorite saying of my husband Dan’s: How far can you open your mind before your brain falls out?

Is it that our media focuses on the drama, allowing people to be rude and outspoken, to dish out all sorts of outrageous nonsense in the name of entertainment, that we find it OK to be assholes?  Or have we always had this asinine behavior but now it’s just more in our spheres of consciousness?  Does that make it worse?  Or are we revealing it, thus increasing awareness and hopefully causing many to realize this is NOT the way we want to live?  Is this free-for-all of rudeness bringing about a transformation to peace?

I believe that self-awareness and mindfulness make us more aware of incivility, especially our own.  And, in awareness is the awakening to the non-productive and negative aspects of uncivil behavior. Our awareness is the first step to making a change in our own lives to improve how we interact.  We can each take steps, once aware, to treat the other with compassion and love rather than hatred and intolerance.  As a believer in Karma and the Three-Fold Law, I find that what I give out comes back and in knowing that I want compassion and love, I know that is what I need to give.  I am not perfect in living this but I feel I am making progress in being less antagonistic. [Danny may occasionally disagree!]

And I do believe that the more open-minded we are, the less judgmental we tend to be, the more accepting and tolerant and thus, the more civil.  Being open-minded involves some level of awareness that we just don’t know it all.  An ability to say, “I don’t know” is a good start to having an ability to be civil.  It is in knowing for sure, with complete certainty, that we do not allow the other to have his space for a difference in opinion.

Civility is claiming and caring for one’s identity, needs and beliefs without degrading someone else’s in the process.

~Tomas Spath and Cassandra Dahnke, Founders, Institute for Civility in Government

From the Institute for Civility in Government website:  Civility is about more than just politeness, although politeness is a necessary first step. It is about disagreeing without disrespect, seeking common ground as a starting point for dialogue about differences, listening past one’s preconceptions, and teaching others to do the same. Civility is the hard work of staying present even with those with whom we have deep-rooted and fierce disagreements. It is political in the sense that it is a necessary prerequisite for civic action. But it is political, too, in the sense that it is about negotiating interpersonal power such that everyone’s voice is heard, and nobody’s is ignored.

And civility begins with us.

 

http://www.instituteforcivility.org/who-we-are/what-is-civility/

Some friends of mine recently got together to discuss Civility and one of the quotes was a proverb: A civil question deserves a civil answer.  I agree.  I think we learn much when we come together to discuss ideas, as long as we have a respect for each other’s ideas, especially when they differ from our own.  The U-Group where Dan and I participate is a wonderful opportunity for this kind of sharing.  We sit with friends, read ideas/quotes on a topic, contemplate these ideas in silence, and then discuss them with a single person holding the floor while the others listen intently.  This space is sacred in that it is full of love and acceptance for all the ideas and words shared.  It is a place where each of us can develop a new understanding within the self.

However, I think often these days many of us are not asking civil questions but questions that provoke, questions that give us an opportunity to expound on our own opinions without any true curiosity regarding any possible difference of opinion.  One of my favorite sayings is that the goal of any argument should not be success but understanding.  It seems many of us are too focused on success and reassuring ourselves that we are right, than in trying to dig deeper into an issue to find a bigger understanding.  I am learning more as I age that it is better to listen to others than to share in conversation because I then gain more information than I already had.  And often, my opinion is nonessential.  I find also that, even when people ask for my thoughts, sometimes there isn’t truly an openness to hear them.  I’m pretty blunt at times so perhaps it is just that I dish it out a little too strongly!  But I do find that people are often open to me, in sharing and listening, I think because I tend to be relatively non-judgmental.

In this day, it seems many are quick to judge and condemn. This is discussed in-depth in a recent book So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed by Jon Ronson.  Ronson delivers a good read about the way public shaming has come back to life (think Twitter remarks and FB posts) and, like the whipping post of the past, has resulted in much undeserved punishment.  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pillory He tells a few compelling stories of those who have been quite publicly shamed that give insight for consideration.  His stories are based on talking with these individuals and it’s interesting to hear the different responses to the shaming experience.  We see it all the time on FB – quick responses on posts, condemning or criticizing the ideas or actions of others.  But who are we to jump on another for some slight failing?  Are we not all human?  Do we not all fail in small ways each day?  Can we not have a bit more compassion for the fact that we’re all doing our best, or at least trying?  Sure there is an occasional outright attempt to be shocking or rude.  But doesn’t this behavior indicate a real suffering that perhaps may need attention?  Perhaps we should keep in mind that each of us is dealing with our own personal struggles every day and sometimes these struggles do not allow us to perform at our best.  When encountering someone being uncivil, sometimes a reflection on what horrors they may be facing helps me have compassion even with the most angry, abusive, or combatant of foes.

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/camelswithhammers/2013/02/the-camels-with-hammers-civility-pledge/  Found this to be an interesting read on the subject.

I find that I am the most impolite when I am Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired (HALT). Years ago in recovery, I learned about the HALT methodology to check myself for balance to realize where I might need to adjust.  It is a good personal check-in to determine when I may be not taking care of myself which, in turn, means I am also more likely to be taking things out on those around me.  I also need to take care when I am feeling fear or stress, which also inhibit my ability to keep a clear mind.

Inner civility is another space for contemplation.  How civil am I to ME?  Is it possible that my level of inner civility drives what I am capable of with others?  Does that give me a small pause in considering the impolite person?  Is he, in his inner dialogue, completely inhumane to himself as well?  How hellish a life must that be?  Perhaps I can have a moment of compassion for him.

My Youtube channel recently had some comments going back and forth.  The video was of the DAPL Protest site in Cannon Ball, ND.  It was a video I took on arrival at the site as I was transfixed by the power of song and dance being used in the non-violent action.  The argument in the comments was ridiculous nonsense with one commenting that the music and dance were horrible and the other pushing back against the pro-oil stance of the initial commenter. Both were disrespectful and immature.  As I contemplated this later, and thought back to my own experience of “being the asshole”, I realized this: The path of incivility is an easy downward slope, but when you later realize that we are all human and deserving of respect, it’s often a long, painful trudge back from the valley.

The Community Ed movie this week was Tangerines, presented by Ken Howell who reminded us to not confuse this movie with Tangerine (a story about a transgender sex worker who finds that her boyfriend/pimp is cheating on her).  The movie, followed by discussion, was a beautiful opportunity to reflect on the nature of war and human civility.  In this film about war-torn Georgia, a scuffle results in two soldiers sharing a small house together with a local man, Ivo, as they recover from their battle wounds.  One soldier is Georgian and the other Chechenian.  Enemies in the fight.  Both had lost comrades from their side.  And during their recovery, groups of soldiers show up to visit Ivo’s house, with interesting outcomes. The personal interactions are beautiful and heartening though left somewhat open for interpretation (like all good art films).  My take-away from the movie was that, if we could all just enjoy a meal together, we’d find our common humanity and some level of civility with each other that would end all war and conflict. If we could all just stay in the moment, simply and quietly enjoying common ideas… that we need love, that we can serve each other, that we all want a better world for our children… we could find peace.  I urge you to put this film on your To Watch List as the characters are well played and the story well told.  It also will give you a look at what Harn life is like – the similarities were striking at times… a simple life of tea and soup, woodstove and woods.

I’m looking forward to that life.

Can America Heal from its Racist Roots?

Tags

American Dream, communication, cooperation, Rule of 3

This country was built on the genocide of one race and the enslavement of another.  Genocide and Slavery are not just the American Way.  This is the way of much of the colonization and empire building throughout the centuries.  And yes, there are still outposts of slavery, there is still a slave trade in human trafficking that many pretend doesn’t exist, and there is oppression of all kinds around the globe.  But America seems unique in our propagation of practices which unequally affect people of color.  And the events of last week in three days are seeming to bring us to the brink of comprehension that we absolutely must address this issue. FINALLY.  But what is the root of issue?  It is VERY complex. However, I am in hopes that we are beginning to awaken and will start working toward resolution.

The problem we see resulting in the murder of black men by police (that’s the way I see it) has many roots.  Of course slavery… but more recently, economic segregation, scapegoating and inequality.  Power seems to be at the root of it to me.  Those in power do not want to share it and thus find ways to subjugate [bring under domination or control, especially by conquest] others, those with the least power being the most affected, in keeping said power and wealth.  As a white woman I have seen injustice in pay scales, working with men making more money than me for doing the same or lesser work.  But I know that my privilege [a special right, advantage, or immunity granted or available only to a particular person or group of people] and entitlement [the fact of having a right to something] blind me to the plight of those who are inexorably disadvantaged.

As it is coming more and more to light in many places in this nation, I am having my own awakening to racism.  At Northland Rec Lab this year, I had the amazing experience of being with Dasha Kelly (http://dashakelly.com/) and Kima Hamilton (https://www.facebook.com/kimahamilton?fref=ts).  Dasha walked us through several exercises related to writing but also to addressing our own perceptions, including our racist tendencies.  She helped us look at expressing ourselves in new ways.  And Kima did this presentation for us and I sat with tears, barely containing sobs.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B4AntFF9M7s  (His piece starts at 0:45 seconds.  The sound on this recording is not perfect; seeing this in person was so much more intense.  Standing 20’ from me, Kima’s presence was palpable as he spoke these words.)  So relevant.  So powerful.  But as big as his impact with this performance was, his impact on me with a few simple words is what I keep close in mind from our interactions.  With five simple words from Kima, I was dumbfounded into silence and immobility. I was shocked into a profound humility and a deeper understanding.

I’d approached Dasha and Kima with a simple question that had been running around my mind.  I realized of late that I am often forgetful of the fact that I am fat when interacting with others.  Though the America population is increasingly growing in individual size, I know that my weight calls me out as different. But I often forget and feel like I am skinny.  I actually joke that I’m a reverse anorexic because I feel skinnier than I truly am.  And I realized that sometimes I feel just like a human, not a fat human among average body type humans, not different… but the same.  And I had been wondering if it was in any way similar in being black.  Was there ever a time when you felt like you were just a human, not a black human?  Because Dasha and Kima had opened themselves to these discussions as the only two black people among a huge group of whites (and one Asian), I explained this idea to them and then asked as we walked toward the Dining Hall, “Is there anything similar for you? Do you ever forget you’re black?”

Dasha seems like a sister from another mother to me.  I just LOVE her vivacious, bold, funny, flamboyant personality.  Her amazing way with words and her open, loving, welcoming style make you feel like you’ve known her forever.  And she and I engaged in a quick conversation about this idea.  We thought about possibilities and examined the idea commenting back and forth as Kima walked along with us in silence.  When we arrived at the building, she turned to him and said, “What do you think, Kima?”  And he looked at me, at least it felt like he looked directly at me, through me even, and said almost in an off-hand way as if it should have been obvious, “I never forget I’m black.”

It should have been obvious.  I realized it immediately.  Kima is a big man. A big, black man.  A man with dreads.  A man with physical strength and size.  And that is what many see.  That and only that.  Forget his beautiful and friendly smile.  Forget his loving heart that shines through his encouraging and considerate words.  Forget his gentle touch on your shoulder as he walks past or his quiet, open face that listens intently to you… or watches, like a child seeing it for the first time, as Laura demonstrates methods in clay during her workshop.  Forget that he’s human.  It’s easy to do in this programmed place where we reside.

We see it nightly on our screens. Black man = Criminal.  Black man = Danger.  Black man = Scary.  Even my friend here in Alexandria recently said that her black daughters were exclaiming concern over a “black man” outside their home.  We are ALL being programmed to fear black men.

After that question to Dasha and Kima, I realized how crucial it is that I continue talking with People of Color to try to comprehend a bigger perspective.  To expand my understanding and hopefully contribute to doing something toward reducing racism, my own and that of others.  As I walked to the next workshop moments later, I had an emotional breakdown.  I began to relive my past relationships with black people like an end-of-life, flash-before-my-eyes video.  I began crying as I walked in the rain and by the time I got to the building, I was sobbing aloud.  I remembered Bobby Whitehead. My mother occasionally likes to tell the story of how I came home from elementary school one day to let her know, “I’m going to marry Bobby Whitehead.”  I remember Ivy Green, my best friend in 1st grade.  We were fast friends.  I remember Lavesa Peterson, my best friend in 6th grade.  She lived in the projects behind the Kroger.  I didn’t know what projects were but I remember seeing the difference in her home and mine.  Not that it was a big impact then.  I just wanted to hang out with my friend, I wasn’t evaluating her environment. But I remember being the one who was different in this world of black people.  Lavesa got pregnant soon after and disappeared from my life. I thought back to that one time I went to the Society of Black Engineers meeting, again being the one person who was different.  Why didn’t I go back?  Was I afraid?  Intimidated?  Or just indifferent?  I remember Deb Hudson and Wendell Harris, co-workers at Inland Steel who would challenge me and converse with me in open ways.  It seems my whole life I’d been given opportunities but squandered them.  I sat in that bathroom letting all this emotion wash over me, feeling the regret of so many years.  As my sobs subsided, I thought to myself, “I don’t want to do that anymore.  From this point forward, I want to work to find space in my life to interact with people of color.  I have to work on this when I get an opportunity.”

I don’t know if I had any idea of what this would mean. But I committed to engaging with a new friend for whom I have a lot of respect based on the couple interactions we’d had of late.  She’s a black woman who speaks her mind boldly, often surprising me with her comments.  Her honesty and openness is refreshing.  On several occasions, we’d talked briefly, both seeing a comrade I believe.  A few weeks after Rec Lab, I found an opportunity to meet with her.  I spent time listening to her story and was amazed by it.  I was thrilled by the loving connection I felt to this woman and was happy to have found a friend, a sister, a woman with whom I can share and listen with both of us finding fulfillment.  And I am hopeful that there will be from our friendship some progress on race relations. Every interaction brings us closer to breaking down those barriers that exist when people of difference do not collaborate.

Why is it that America seems to continue to struggle?  I think part of it is due to the fact that we have never made amends for past transgressions.  “History is written by the victors” says Howard Zinn.  And his literary work was based on rectifying this by writing history from the perspective of the vanquished.  His People’s History of the United States is worth a read.  Here’s a *.pdf if you care to pursue it… http://www.thegoyslife.com/Documents/Books/A%20People’s%20History%20of%20the%20United%20States-%20Howard%20Zinn.pdf  This work shows how, over and over in America, those in power have continued to quell the masses with small indulgences while maintaining and growing their power and status.  The current state of American politics is that we will likely have the choice of voting for one of two millionaires, one beholden only to himself and one beholden to many wealthy donors and corporations.  Where is the candidate truly representing the people?  Not on the ballot in most cases.  Some of us may take the opportunity to vote for another woman, Jill Stein of the Green Party, as a way of rebelling against the limitations brought by two parties very much aligned in continuing our capitalist, imperialist, militarized, and corporatized future.  One owned by the few and supported by the poor, umempowered masses. One that is rapidly depleting and destroying our planet.  And People of Color lose disproportionately in Climate Change too.

[Sorry, I just needed a bit of humor to keep from screaming.  Get your bumper sticker here: http://www.northernsun.com/Destroy-Planet-Before-Jesus-Bumper-Sticker-(7280) ]

There are many roots to the problems causing the issues associated with race in this country.  And I’m not sure where to begin but making amends for past transgressions would be a good start.  Paying a $15 minimum wage to assure all workers get a reasonable chance at living without intense poverty.  Giving People of Color more opportunities to do ANY job they want, get ANY education they want, live ANYWHERE they want.  I know that politicians like to keep us divided, fighting amongst ourselves while they run away with all the spoils.  They keep us in fear of each other, typically pitting Whites again People of Color, making them the scapegoats.  This way, we’re not watching while they make more rules to benefit those who own our political system.

The Non-Fiction Book Club at Cherry Street Books is currently reading The Warmth of Other Suns by Isabel Wilkerson about the migration of Blacks from the South to the North.  The story follows three individuals but also speaks of the migration at large, the reasons behind it, and the ramifications for those participating.  It addresses the misconceptions held by many, that Southern Blacks were more likely to be on welfare, caused more crime, had more children, thus making things worse when they moved North.  None of these perceptions of the migrants was based in fact, but only on prejudice. Data showed that Southern Blacks were often smarter than Northern Blacks and even many Northern Whites.  They were typically very productive citizens, even against all odds of finding equal employment, fair wages and affordable housing.  And they paved the way for their kids to do better by giving them the advantage of growing up with more education, freedom and opportunity than they’d had in the South.

In the book, the South was often depicted as more easy to deal with than the North.  In the South, the laws were written to legitimize the unequal treatment of Blacks.  In the North, there were no laws but the practices were in place nonetheless.  The mirage of freedom and equality in the North was much harder to dispel than Southern laws which could be changed with the swipe of a pen.

While we’re no longer lynching Blacks in public displays, the inherent racism in our present society creates a system that still stifles the ability of Blacks to progress, limits their access to success, and impedes their experience of justice.  I know things are better for Blacks in many ways but we’re progressing much too slowly and of late we’re seeming to regress.

It is much more complex than simply Loving Your Neighbor Regardless of Color but this is a good place for many of us to start.  To not “Love your neighbor” based simply on the color of her skin is truly ridiculous.  There is no sense in it. Some say Racism is a mental illness and I must say this makes sense to me.  Our current society is a culture of fear and in it, skin color is a marker for many negative concepts.  But this is programmed perception and thus it can be changed.  Prejudice is taught.  And acceptance and fairness can be taught in its place.  We can find ways to overcome ignorance, indifference, and inexperience.  We can consider our own thoughts and ideas and find the irrationality.  We can find opportunities to open our minds and create interactions that bring new ideas and perceptions.  We can do this together.

The answers are complex but I encourage you to consider what you can do.  If you are black, begin a conversation with a white person in your world and see what comes of it.  If you’re white, invite a black person to coffee and see where you find common ground.  At the very least, we all want…

• love and acceptance
• happiness
• a better world for our children
• to have enough
• to BE enough.

Find a way today to give these things to someone else and goodness will surely come to you. What you reap, you sow.  Sow some oats of Redemption.  I hope for many conversations in the coming days and I hope even more for real progress on race relations in this country.

 

Bees!

Tags

cooperation, living local, local food, simplicity, sustainability

I am Super excited to report this week on my opportunity to learn from a very experienced beekeeper. 🙂 Lewis Struthers, of Parkers Prairie, has been working with bees for over 65 years now and while his brothers are large-scale operators, he does a fair “hobby” business with his 15 yards.  For those of you who don’t know bees, I learned that a really good hive can produce 100# of honey in a good season.  So, with an average of 10 hives per yard, his 15 yards could garner 15,000# of honey!!  Lewis was explaining harvest time and told me he runs quite a few 5# jars (the biggest seller) and then he fills 600# barrels.  It was mind boggling.  But I can now attest that the difference in an empty Super and a partially filled Super is quite obvious.  What’s a Super?  We’ll get that shortly… Here’s Lewis!

When Lewis recently offered to share a beekeeping trip with me, I was thrilled.  As we began our afternoon, it was like he was speaking a different language and my brain struggled with comprehension.  He’s lived a life of bee-speak and talked quickly about drones, frames and excluders while I listened trying to translate all the terminology into sense.  By the end of the day, I was really picking it up but I’m sure I missed much of his explanation as I was lost in translation.  So, here’s a little overview to help you – granted, I may have some of this wrong!  (Feel free to comment below with corrections!)

The Hive box contains the bees and the reproduction areas, as well as some honey storage area.  It’s a wooden box about 15” x 20” with 10 hanging frames that are about 1” thick, 15” across and 9” deep.  There is a little spacer between each frame and a space at the bottom for bee bodies.  Each frame has a centerline divider (wood or plastic) with a raised honeycomb pattern on which the bees will build wax comb to hold honey and new bees.  The Excluder is a wire frame placed between the Hive box and the Supers to keep the brooding (bee baby making) out of the Super, which you hope to be full of just honey.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7NjjbVifUM

The Excluder looks like a cookie cooling sheet or a mini oven rack except that it’s completely flat.  The wire sections are too small for the queen and drones to pass through but allow the worker bees to pass into the upper sections where honey is made.  The Super is similar to the Hive box except it’s only about 6” deep instead of ~9.5” deep.  If you are lucky enough to exclude the queen, you will end up with pure honeycomb filled with honey, no bee babies.  We did find one hive with Supers full of baby production but we could not locate that queen for our lives!

There are also bottom boards and inner covers which are at bottom and top of the box, respectively.  This time of year, the bottom boards are sometimes replaced with a screen frame which gives more ventilation to the bees and allows better moisture removal from the honey.  We put in about a half dozen of these screen bottoms in the two yards we visited.  Each Hive Box is covered with a metal top that keeps water out of the hive.

I thought I was adorably punny when I noted to Lewis that this trip was Super fun! 🙂

Lewis and I visited two of his local bee yards in Alexandria and Carlos.  The two yards are in quite different locations, one in thigh high grass and one in a clearing in the woods.  It was interesting to see the differences and similarities in these locations.  We found mice, spiders and ants in both but only the woods location had me getting mosquito bites.  And yes, I’m sure it’s on your mind…. Did you get stung?  Well, I did.  As did Lewis.  So we both killed a bee.  😦   My sting was an avoidable mishap and I knew it was coming.  Lewis had handed me a frame so I could see the weight of the honey and, at the last moment, I saw the bee at the ear where I was taking hold of the frame.  (Ears are little ledges at the tops of the frames that hold them at the top ridge of the hive box.)  It wasn’t as bad as I thought it might be, but I knew I’d been stung.  Video is available here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PG2kQZ3KAwQ

Yes, I was filming at the time.  I was able to quickly brush the stinger from the tip of my finger and then stick my finger in my mouth to try to suck out the poison deposited there.  I was typing pretty well with this finger the next day but it was still a bit sensitive and the first day had a swollen, warm feeling in the first section of that index finger for several hours.  By day two, there was little remnant of the issue.  Lewis’ sting happened at the second yard as we were dealing with some quite peeved bees.  One got him on his index finger and he brushed the bee away at the moment.  Driving back to my car later, he couldn’t recall which finger had been stung as he’d had no reaction to the sting. He says you acclimate to it.

When we arrived at the first yard, I felt a little in the way, standing and watching Lewis work.  I asked him to let me know if I could help and he said, “You’re here to learn today, not to work.”  Ten minutes later, he’d changed his mind as I jumped in to help find screen bottoms in the various piles hidden in the grass. Once he saw I was ready to assist, he was glad to have the help.  I was able to do only a small portion of the work but it gave me a sense of the tasks and helped me to see that this IS something I could do.  Granted, I’d be looking at one hive, not the hundreds that Lewis manages!  I’m hoping to get out later in the season with him to see more aspects of the operation and, hopefully I’ll be able to assist at harvest and see the ins and outs of honey processing.

One thing that surprised me was the simplicity of his operation.  He uses very few tools and equipment.  We each wore a bee hat (kind of like a safari hard hat) covered with a veil – a square meshed netting that sits atop the hard bee hat and protects your face and neck by creating a rectangle around that area.  Netting hangs down from the veil frame and the strings at the bottom of the netting are pulled tight and tied around the chest to prevent bees from getting under the veil, which would not be a good thing!

With regard to the hives, everything was very simple.  Wooden boxes, simple screen bottoms, wire excluders, and metal/wood cover tops.  Wooden frames, some with chewed holes – darn mice!  A small metal pry-bar Lewis used to open the boxes and pull frames apart for inspection.  [Everything the bees touch becomes waxed together.]  And a smoker, a critical piece of equipment that helps keep the bees calm.  Just a can with wood chips and a little grass, stopped up with a Kleenex between yards to prevent it getting too smoky, squeezed gently and occasionally as we worked through the hives.  At one point we found a frame with a broken ear and Lewis installed a metal replacement ear which he nailed on with 4 small nails making the frame good as new.  Nothing fancy.  It felt very unintimidating compared with some of the high tech bee suits and hive paraphernalia I’ve seen on TV, YouTube, and Google.  In this photo below you see: the Excluder screen leaning on a Super, the Smoker, a Hive Box partially filled with Frames, and a few Frames outside the box.

We first looked at the “nukes”, new 4-frame hives that Lewis was hoping had developed queens (photo below).  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NwGwPvEggE&spfreload=10  When we found queens, we were able to transfer these frames into fully-framed hive boxes, typically adding a brood frame from a stronger hive.  Lewis noted that the bees on the brood frames we placed in the new hives would find their way back to their home hives but the brood cells would be left in place and these bees would hatch and become part of the new colony.  Giving these young queens a head start with brood cells gives the hive a fighting chance at making their way to being a strongly producing colony.  I believe these new colonies he lets keep all their honey the first year, hoping for good production in the following year.

In order to find good brood frames, we looked through the stronger, more productive hive boxes and this gave us a chance to check the progress on these colonies.  Often we would add an Excluder and a Super or two as this is the heavy production time of year for his girls.  Lewis made clear several times that it is the GIRLS who do all the work and he has a great respect for them, both in the bee world and the human realm!  Here’s a little video on workers and queens.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSsjcQ8X7mY  And, yep, that’s me holding that frame!!

Lewis showed me the comb with honey which looks like black water as it reflects in the sunlight.  We could also see pollen stored in some cells.  Then there were egg cells, larvae cells and capped brood cells (which look kind of like capped honey cells to this Nube).  The freaky stuff are the drone cells, which are like yellow mushrooms exploding from the comb ~ puffy topped cells, and the queen cells which hang off perpendicular to the comb and are really large, reminding me of morel mushroom tops.  The queens are not too difficult to find, especially once Lewis points them out to you…  After finding my first queen pretty readily, thereafter I mistook drones for queens, even though Lewis was constantly reminding me that “drones are like fat beer belly guys” while queens have an enlarged and elongated abdomen.  The Young Virgin Queens (queens that may have mated but not yet produced brood cells) are especially hard to find as they are smaller than more developed queens.  Some queens have yellow abdomens while others have black abdomens and, while not a rule, if you see black drones, you will likely see a black abdomen queen.  I still never really picked out a second queen on my own but if Lewis told me he saw one, occasionally I could find her too.

Most of the bees we saw were worker bees with some frames having quite a few drones.  We saw some workers with legs full of pollen.  I told him they reminded me of little motorcycles with saddle bags, which I think tickled him.  When colonies were less productive, the frames were less populated with bees.  Full production hives had loads of bees and much activity.

The day was a bit overcast and the bees were quite mellow.  Lewis noted that this was a bit unusual as they were usually happiest when it was sunny and work was in progress.  But I was glad to have happy bees.  There is a difference when they are mad ~ they will have a higher pitched buzz and come at you more aggressively (though still pretty lamely).  At the first yard we had one or two times when the bees seemed a bit more stirred up.  They had a more high-pitched buzzing sound, definitely like they were warning us to leave.  I would occasionally just stop and wait for them to calm.  The big key was moving deliberately and not too quickly.  Slow and steady wins the day.  Each time Lewis would open a new hive box, he would smoke a bit, then pry the top off slowly.  When he would remove the first frame, he would go quite slowly and smoothly.  Once he was prying frames apart, he would move a bit quicker but that first frame was slow and steady every time.

As we left the first yard, Lewis stopped to show me a hive box tied up in a tree.  This is an empty box that he has available in case of swarm.  It won’t really help a swarm at this yard as bees typically go more than 2 miles away to find a new hive when they swarm.  But he did catch a swarm last year in this box so sometimes a colony from elsewhere will come find new digs in these extra boxes.  He has a yard about 3 miles away so, if those bees swarm, there is a chance he’d catch his own colony at the close-but-not-too-close location.

He showed me at the second yard which was located in a clearing in the forest.  This was much darker and cooler, which resulted in mosquito attacks on arrival.  There was even a mouse brave enough to have made a home in the top of one of the hive boxes – he was not home… probably heard us approach.  We destroyed his home and found a few mice in the pile of screens and covers.  They’re quick but a few were not quick enough. 😦

The work here went quicker.  Partly because there were not quite as many productive hives and partly because I was a little more trained.  We took time here for me to pull apart a box to look for developed brood.  Here’s my video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWlKsYOpYos You can see here the little gear we wore (no gloves), the simple tools (pry bar) and equipment (wooden boxes).  I was amazed at my calm in participating in this work.  I found that the bees were not as scary as I thought.  Though we did find one colony which appeared queenless and thus, was not quite as calm and content.  This was the hive where Lewis was stung and he was able to add a queen cell to hopefully bring them a new leader.  Here’s a video of him placing the queen cell: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAydYQQlyG8

I had an enjoyable day helping Lewis with his ladies.  It was a great learning experience.  I am hopeful for the possibility that I can keep bees in the future.  And that Lewis will keep showing me the ropes as I learn more and, in turn, provide a bit more help for him on our visits!  You might want to try some of his honey… it’s yummy!  http://www.honey.com/honey-locator/profile/struthers-honey

Rec Lab 2016 Part 2

Tags

cooperation, Volunteering

What a week!!  Rec Lab 2016 was as much fun as last year – maybe more.  Where to even begin covering all the creativity, laughs, hugs, projects… well, at the beginning, I guess.

Thursday afternoon Dan & I arrived just in time for me to participate in the Instructors’ Craft Walk. Since many of us are presenting our workshop info for the Rec Lab participants on the Friday morning Craft Walk, this is a chance for us to walk through all the projects together and explain our workshops to each other.  It was neat to see the variety of activities from Making Tamales & Canning Basics, to Polymer Clay & Stained Glass, to Leatherworking & Woodworking, to Coffee & Conversation and Book Group, to Tai Chi Chih & Yoga, to Magic & Jugging, to Creative Writing & Instrument Making, to Blue Jean Weaving & Rec Doodle, to Dancing, Singing, and Nature Walks.  There are always too many options and not enough time to do it all, though some try.  I learned this year to commit to a few tasks and incorporate a few smaller things and I found myself quite happy with the output for 2016.  Dan was only there for the weekend but he made a belt and a stained glass piece while also taking lots of time for walking the grounds and getting some great photos.  Here are a few of my favorites.

When I asked him what he liked best about Rec Lab, he said, “the people”, and he took lots of time to chat with a wide range of the participants.  I would have to agree that, as much as I love the techniques and projects, the people are what make Rec Lab truly wonderful and memorable.

While I didn’t make as many projects as last year, I made a few great things: a belt, some Rec Doodles, many polymer clay pieces, tamales, and a few new friends.

I tried Tai Chi Chih again this year and quickly remembered why I didn’t pursue it last year… it’s really tough on my knees.  I perhaps needed to not push so hard but I decided it was too early in the AM to make it past one time, when I found myself up to midnight-2AM every night.  I would have gotten up for yoga but it wasn’t available in the AM this year instead being a workshop session.  Hopefully that will change next year and I can make more sessions.

My main focus this year was Polymer Clay and I jumped in the first workshop session with gusto.  Instructor Laura Burlis is one of my favorite people at Rec Lab; she is amazingly talented.  This year I believe I finally got into the P/C groove as I made some great canes (rolls of clay that you cut into slices) and finished several fun projects with which I was quite happy.

By the second workshop of Rec Lab, I was again “Pulling a First Year” as I bounced between the Rec Doodle and Blue Jean Weaving workshops, trying to learn both techniques in one session.  It worked! Thank goodness they were next door to each other!  I was able to complete a few Doodles and convince myself that I actually WAS capable of the practice – though I do need LOTS more practice.  And while I didn’t make a rug, I was able to comprehend the teachings that Dianne Rowse shared.  As a 2^nd Year, she’s jumped right into the Rec Lab philosophy of sharing a technique and the rugs everyone made were terrific!

Each year at Rec Lab we have Fireside at the end of the night.  The first one was Rhoda sharing about the history of Rec Lab and it was accompanied by a wonderful video of Mary Lou Woodward playing her harp.

We lost Mary Lou this past year but her spirit lives on at Rec Lab and I was able to share with her daughter Marti what a wonderful impact she had on me during the 2015 Rec Lab.  Marti provided lots of beautiful music again this year as the musical Labbers are known to do.  It was nice to craft in the workshop while hearing lovely songs from up the stairs in Cross Fire.

The second Fireside was me!  I was accompanied by Nick & Dianne Rowse and Jerry Brown who played the Josephine Waltz to open and closed with Ashokan Farewell,both beautifully played.  My talk was on Atul Gawande’s book Being Mortal and its important message of improving the way we deal with agingand the end of life.  I followed up with a visualization I do with the Dying the Talk! class I facilitate for Community Ed where we imagine the last event we experienced around death.  It’s a quiet process of looking again at the experience we had and thinking about the good and not so good of it.  Many people thanked me as they found it to be a profound experience while a few expressed that they were unable to stay.  Death is difficult so I understand not being ready to walk through such a practice, depending on where you are with life & death.  But it was touching to know that one of the first people to come up to me had just lost a family member just weeks before and she processed through it so beautifully.  Some told me it brought them peace or a new perspective and I was glad that we had done it early in the week to give people time to process and share the meditation in a safe place surrounded by friends.  I was honored to listen as people shared their stories with me throughout the week.  And I was grateful that several asked me to include the meditation in the Notebook.

The 2016 Notebook (Paula DeReamer)

What’s the Notebook?  Every year, Rec Lab is documented with all the instructors providing handouts/info for reference once Lab is over.  It is also full of photos and documentation of some of the special events.  One downside is that, because it is provided during the Closing Show, nothing from that show is included.  And it’s the highlight of the week… but we’ll get to it in a moment.

The other Firesides were also terrific.  Lutz Jackel shared about his musical instruments, art and home in Germany noting how Rec Lab has transformed his life.  Jane & Hsien Hsin Chang shared about dealing with Dementia.  June Anderson talked about her books on ghosts and the Creative Writing participants shared some excellent work.  Lots of focus on the theme of Transformation.

A major focus of the week is our Discussion which was led this year by Dasha Kelly, an author and speaker from Milwaukee, WI.  Her husband, Kima Hamilton, was an integral part of the presentations and I was overwhelmed by the work they both did in bringing us interactive creativity by reading her work (Almost Crimson) and giving Rec Labbers a chance to react to it, teaching us about how we use words, walking us through looking at personal needs for change, helping us to evaluate racism, and knowledge to allow logic to evaluate our writing only after creativity has played its role.  Her wonderful lessons, full of tools and ideas, gave us all much to contemplate during the week.  I had a pivotal moment that gave me pause to consider a lifetime of experience and how I will move forward following this new comprehension.  Truly a beautiful transformative experience for me.

Mardi Gras night was our celebration evening and it was full of hilarious games.  Krista Hegland and Karen Jacobson really made the event rock.  Our team struggled with a couple of the events but we had a fantastic time playing!  Almost as much fun as the games was the diversity of creative costumes.

I had good attendance for my Saturday Book Group and even more people came for the Tuesday meeting.  We learned about a flurry of wonderful books.  [For those interested in books, you will find a listing of the books we discussed in next week’s blog.]  And I had a few show up for the workshop on How You Want to be Remembered.  While this was not truly a review of Obits/Epitaphs/Funeral Plans/Legacy Letters as planned, I believe if we did this as a 2-part workshop, it could be.  As it was, it became very much a typical Dying to Talk! session.  I enjoyed learning from everyone sharing their experiences and I hope others found it to be worth their time.

Another aspect of Rec Lab is the Auction.  Lots of participants bring items to auction.  Sometimes these are purchased items, sometimes things we’re ready to let go to another, some bring arts & crafts they’ve created and the most coveted things are often the homemade candies. We ended up spending a bit more than expected but we went home with lots of great items, including some of the homemade caramels!

There is Folk Dancing every evening at Rec Lab and, while I’m not a big participator in this, I did attend the Chair Dancing evening.  And, since we had a new instructor for dance this year, we chose this night of dancing as the one to use for the Closing Program.  More on that in a moment…

I spent most of my free time in Polymer Clay, but I found a free workshop period to spend with Danny making Tamales as BJ Hall shared her cooking skills with the group.  As an experienced restaurant owner, she not only gave us detailed instructions but she also spiced the session with her sarcastic wit. Making tamales is a lot of work but a simple process.  We made about 10 dozen in a little over an hour (the meat was already cooked).  I think it’s something we can do at home but it would be a major project… and certainly not as much fun without a gang of people.

Partway through the week, and after Dan had left, I had a minor medical issue with this growth I’ve been dealing with on my right shoulder.  I had showered being careful to not
get the bandage wet which was a mistake as it stuck to the wound causing it to break open when I tried to re-bandage it.  I tracked down one of the medically trained Rec Labbers and she was able to patch me up.  Unfortunately, the medical supplies were limited but an eye patch and some colorful duct tape gave my treatment the Rec Lab touch it needed.  I joked that my Psyche Nurse gave me a Psychedelic Bandage.  [Update – I’m having the alien removed today, before I head for Indiana.]

Closing Night is always a celebration of the week with a spoofing of some of the new instructors.  This year’s show was MC’d by Tina Rohde and Colleen Shaskin with lots of interweaving of Laura Burlis and it was fantastically hilarious!  The story was of a Mardi Gras float being built and it was made on a frame of Metal Clay painted with Rosemaling (both new classes this year). The entertainment for the float included the outdoor game of Wüdd (spoofing Krista’s Outdoor Games), presented by Sherry Bruckner as “quick, fun & easy” and played by the Florells (Paul and Judy playing as John and Sarah).  Sarah shared with me afterward that she’d been looking for her Capri pants and couldn’t find them.  When Judy jumped up to play Wüdd, Sarah was thinking, “Hey, that’s my headband.  Wait, that’s my shirt.  Those are my Capris!!”  Judy was totally decked out as Sarah and she and Paul impersonated the kids with flair ~ it was a total laugh riot.  Danny said he was out walking the day they played the game and it took forever.  They asked him to play but he declined, seeing the endlessness of the game.  The spoof wound through the show with the Florells coming up three times to show the game as taking from afternoon, through dinner and into total darkness. Krista was laughing out loud with the roast of her event.

Jenifer Burlis-Freilich and I demonstrated the Chair Dancing (taught by Caron Grantz Keljik) where we spoofed her single-armed instruction by presenting our instructor, Laura Burlis, with both hands tied up at opposite shoulders.  We did an outrageous stretch of the practice by having me lie on the floor under Jenny’s chair for a portion of the dance… a great place for “seniors to take a nap as needed during class”. 🙂 And we left the stage dancing with our Chair Dancing partners… our actual chairs.  So much fun!

The only group to get not one but TWO standing ovations was a duo with 180 years of experience.  Yes, 180.  One is 89 and the other 91 and combined, they made quite the pair, and definitely the best of the pre-parade entertainment!  Ladies and gentlemen… Rod Gist & Galen Cain.

Closing night always ends with an announcement of the new Boss (President of the Board) who will lead the development for the next Rec Lab and this year it will be June Fettig.  Newly elected Board members this year are Kathy Tapper (1-year term for Tea Time) and, for the 3-year terms: Sarah Florell, Colleen Shaskin, Laura Burlis and ME!  Should be a great team and I’m excited about what we’ll be doing.

Only 51 weeks to go until next year!  As a member of the Board, I’m sure those weeks will go faster than I will believe.

See y’all next year!

Rec Lab 2016 Part 1

Tags

cooperation, Death, Finding Fulfillment, Volunteering

This week, I’m at Rec Lab (more formally known as Northland Rec Lab if you want to check out FB).  Last year was my first year and I had an amazing time.  I made a bunch of wonderful things, met dozens of lovely people, had a load of wonderful conversations and was truly inspired about crafting.  So I knew I’d be back this year and was hoping Dan would come with me.  So he’s at the weekend portion of Rec Lab and I’m staying the whole week.

Last year I made a couple stained glass items, a stepping stone of the property, a water stone for the frogs, kumihimo, a flute, a mixed media craft, a rainbow bottle stopper, a peyote beaded keychain, a switch plate and lots of other polymer clay things.  It was amazing fun.

Last year I also participated in the closing ceremony with my new Rec Lab friend Laura Burlis – she is a total hoot!  She’d planned this whole Oscar Night spoof for Rec Lab and I played the “first year” who was always running everywhere trying to be involved in as much as possible.  Yes, no acting skills required.

Laura taught the Polymer Clay workshop and I fell in love with this stuff.  I made a few really cool items even though I had to miss some key classes due to other craft workshops I’d elected.  This year, Polymer Clay is my number one priority!  I am hoping to get to Make Tamales as well… I’ve always wanted to know how to do this.  And of course, more Stained Glass.

So what exactly is this Rec Lab?  It’s basically a week of summer camp but held in spring and for grown ups.  There are people there younger than me who attend but I’d say our average age is closer to 65 or 70.  Just like when I used to hang out with Gramma Callecod and her Seniors, I had a blast with these “old folks”.  Though I will admit, these Seniors look a lot younger now that I’m so much closer to being one myself!

Here’s the pre-work I did for my stepping stone.  It depicts the property up north including the road, tamarack pines, driveway, popple trees, ruffed grouse, red squirrel, iris, big rock, woodpile and Harn.

And here’s the mid-way point of my switch plate cover.  The first step was creating a color blend with the clay.  Love this technique.

Next week I’ll have a full update on the week of Rec Lab. Not sure I’ll get nearly so many crafts made but… we’ll see!!

Holding on to the Dream

Tags

being nice, Bernie, communication, conservation, cooperation, dreaming, family, sustainability

I woke up one day last week to this Sailboat of Dawn and it brought a beautiful feeling that reminded me to stay on track sailing toward my dreams.

What is our biggest dream?

The Harn.  The work at the property is progressing with wood clearing and processing.  We had a little snafu with one woodpile.  It just didn’t look quite right after we’d stacked it. And as the weight of the pile sunk into the wet, thawing ground… it seemed to get worse.  Almost visibly changing before your eyes.

As we took a break on the porch (minutes after the above photo was taken – Danny says I shouldn’t have leaned on it, but I swear I didn’t!) and prepared for leaving for Easter dinner with some friends… we heard the crash and knew immediately it was our woodpile.  It was a wreck!

As remedy, we grabbed one of our newly scavenged pallets and re-stacked.  It was not fun having the do the work twice but it taught a valuable lesson on the importance of a good, level base and proper stacking.

Our next pile looked much better.

How do we hang onto our dreams?

We were recently talking with some friends who also are living a somewhat alternative lifestyle and we discussed how some people just can’t seem to cease criticizing.  Whether it’s family members, church folks, friends or general people you run across in town, everyone has an opinion.  And when you choose to live a life that is outside the mainstream, people often can’t comprehend and sometimes feel a need to explain to you why you are wrong.  It reminds me of the saying: “People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.”  Just because some people don’t comprehend your dream doesn’t mean it won’t come true.

We, and our friends, are watching our dreams unfold before us as we work towards them.  It may be in fits and starts, may take longer than we originally hoped, but materialize they do.  These dreams are nurtured with talking and drawing and doing, with imagining and believing and working.  We share our successes and advise against repeating our failures.  Actually, I like to refer to “failures” as “learning lessons”.  In each attempt, something new is learned, even if it does not bring the success or outcome originally intended.  Sometimes it brings an idea which never would have come.

Take, for example, our Rocket Mass Heater (RMH).  Last fall, we were disappointed that we didn’t get very far with our cob work (the mass surrounding the exhaust tubes).  We felt like we should have started the project earlier in the summer rather than waiting so late in the season.  But, what we realize this spring is that the exposed tubing heats the Harn pretty quickly once we fire the stove.  (We are losing a lot of heat through the chimney but it’s not the end of the world.)  Once all the mass is added, it will take much longer to heat our space because the mass soaks up the heat first.  Typically you don’t want to fire the RMH unless you have several days over which to enjoy it so a short weekend would make the fully massed RMH not as useful as is our partially completed RMH.  So we have learned that we will leave a portion of the tubing exposed for quicker heat up until such time as we are here on a more permanent basis.  (BTW, if you care to support a wonderful Kickstarter for an upcoming book on how to build your own RMH… click here https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/rmhbuildersguide/the-rocket-mass-heater-builders-guide?ref=nav_search to donate to our mentors’ {Ernie & Erica Wisner} project.  They are getting amazing feedback and we’ve been privy to some of the draft info.  These two are true masters and this will be a wonderful reference book for building an inexpensive heating system that also is gentle to our environment.  Even a $3 donation will be worth your while as I hear Ernie’s truffles are fantastic.)

So we ignore the naysayers, which is sometimes even us, to hang on to knowing we are progressing in the way that we are and believing this is the way it is intended.  Because it is the way it is.

Danny got me a wonderful gift reminder for Valentine’s Day and it’s come in quite handy over the last month or so as I’ve faced criticism.  It’s a card set based on The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.  The Four Agreements are: 1) Be Impeccable In Your Word. 2) Don’t Take Things Personally. 3) Don’t Make Assumptions.  4) Always Do Your Best.  One of the most insightful cards I read recently was:

It helped me remember that what others think of me is often not based on ME but THEM.  In turn, I must realize that what I think of others is not about THEM but ME.  It gives much food for thought.  And today’s card I read as I took a photo of this one was also quite timely:

I feel like I’ve had to learn this one over and over again.

And what’s the big dream outside my span of control?

Bernie!!

Bernie is picking up momentum.  He’s won 5 of the last 6 states in a big way and the one he didn’t win, Arizona, had massive voting issues.  There’s no way of knowing what the difference would have been if people had been allowed to properly have their voices heard.  But it does reveal apparent efforts to have the voice of the people stifled.

Bernie has a good chance of continuing his strong gains as most of the upcoming contests show him favored to win. (Sketch credit: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Bernie-Sanders-545088750)

I am keeping my hope for him alive as I believe Bernie is our best chance for a happy future and our only hope to beat Trump.  If you have resources and gumption, please donate to his campaign and help push him to victory.  https://go.berniesanders.com/page/content/contribute

 

Tree Relo & Pi Day 2016

Tags

communication, cooperation, family, Finding Fulfillment, Freedom, living local, sustainability

What a weekend!!

Every so often at the property, we need to clear trees.   The first big clear was for the pole barn location and that was pretty grand.  The second big clear was when we thought we were going to put a cabin closer to the road, which turned out not to be our plan in the end, but we are going to be using that cleared area for hoop/greenhouse space within the next few years.  This phase was to provide clearing for a house garden and water storage, along with clearing some trees to allow light for the garden area.

We arrived Saturday evening after swinging through F/M (Fargo/Moorhead for those not from these parts) for the Celtic Festival where our friend Mikko Cowdery was playing.  Mikko & Friends is an eclectic mix of folks, constantly changing but always delightful.  As we got there early, we had time to chat with Mikko a bit and see some of the displays.  The Celtic Festival is a small affair but well-done.  Lots of activities for the children and amazing food (the Concordia chef was on hand).  We listened to the pipes and drums which opened the event, then investigated the Viking ship and wandered a bit.  Mikko also told me the tale of the serendipitous way he’d spent the previous night.  He and the group were practicing in the café at the hotel and there were a few kids close by playing games.  As they played, these youngsters became interested and Mikko and Doug asked if they wanted to learn a song.  They did!  So the guys taught them a few ditties with Chuck playing along on his penny flutes.  They quickly realized these kids could sing. It turns out they are from the Robbinsdale-Armstrong Choir! The group of 6 turned into 12, then 20 and then 40.  It was a grand sing-a-long and it was joyous to hear Mikko sharing about it.  Doug too shared with us later at lunch and then, just as we were leaving, Chuck also gave us a run-down.  I think those kids and those old guys had a magical time.

We too were in store for some magic as we sat down for the Mikko & Friends hour of playing.  They started off with a couple fun ones that we knew so we were able to sing along.  Then, just a couple songs in, these kids started wandering up to the stage.  In all there must have been 75 or more kids piling up on the stage in rows behind the quintet (Annie O’Flynn, Michael Cowdery, Doug Tatge, Michelle Wencl & Chuck Wencl).  Then they began to sing and it was phenomenal.  They did Hard Times, Galway Girl, and many others.  They kids were so happy to be singing and the elders were so happy to have accompaniment. I don’t think Mikko & Friends has ever been such a large crowd!  We were blessed to be able to enjoy it.

After the kids left, Mikko & Friends wrapped up with a couple more, including The Unicorn Song, one of my favorites from the days of summer at Camp Shawano.  Then came The Long Nines, the Burckhard family from Aberdeen, SD.  While we grabbed a quick bite, they set up.  Dan & I shared a combo meal which was the perfect amount of food.  Dan ate a banger, the soda bread and bread pudding while I chomped up the other banger, mashed taters, kraut, and roasted veggies.  Yummy!!  We headed back to stage for the Long Nines show and then watched as they wrapped up with Mikko & Friends joining them on stage.  What tremendous performers.  Definitely will be seeing them again when we get the chance.  We will have a chance to see Mikko & Friends Friday March 18^th at the Quad A.  Hope to see you there!

The ride to the Harn was uneventful, full of rolling prairie, an eagle, and some trumpeter swan flocks.  The scenic route from F/M to DL to Alida was quite relaxing.  When we arrived, the Harn was 42°F while it was in the 60’s outside.  We fired up the stove to take off the chill, eventually getting it up to 82°F before bed time.  We warmed blankets on the exhaust tubes and rolled into bed with them, noting the spring ahead on the clock – already losing time!  Since everything in the Harn was still cold, it was in the low 60’s when we awoke.  Not too bad!  We slept in a bit and, since Dan is the early bird all week long, I took time outside while he rested some more.

I have been reading Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer so wanted to be respectful in our harvest, asking the trees permission.  I sat with the trees explaining what our plans were and asking for their help in getting this done.  I promised them we would value their sacrifice and make sure they all went to good use: some building up dirt, some providing housing for local critters, some for firewood for our home, and some for hugelkulture.  I sat and listened for some time.  Then I walked to each tree asking if it was willing to help by giving its life.  I had asked for them to be clear to me since I was new to this.  They reminded me that I’ve been talking to them for years and I reminded them that I had only been diligently listening for a short time.  But it was clear to me.  I could feel the trees that wanted to stay and the many that were willing to fall.  It was a most humbling experience.

When Dan was up, we talked about our plan.  How to fell the trees and who would do what.  This time he would be our chainsaw operator.  I would be working the loppers.  Drop, lop, drag, and chop.  That was the plan.  We carefully felled each tree, trying to drop them through each other and into clear space without hitting Harn or shed and without getting hurt.  It was amazing work with only a couple trees trying to spin or having too much weight in the wrong place making it hard to control.  But each tree fell where we wanted, within a couple feet.  Only once did we fear damage as we felled one of the larger trees we were dropping between the Harn and shed (a space of about 12-15’), with three trees in between, trying to thread the needle.  The tree fell in a good spot but had a large enough canopy that it shattered with some debris hitting the shed.  No damage done, just a bit nerve-wracking!

We spent some time considering the garden clearing and left more trees than planned so they can act as our garden fencing.  We realized there is no way to have a garden in the middle of the woods without fencing.  In fact, in that area there were easily 5-6 fresh deer scat piles and one more discovered Monday morning, which I think was fresh that day.  Once the garden clearing trees were cut, we lopped the branches, added them to our large brush pile at the south side of the clearing, and pulled each naked trunk to the pallet area across the driveway to cut them down to logs for the fire.  The smaller trees and some branches were piled along the south side of the garden clearing to create a barrier along the path where we will someday have a hugelkulture.  We also made a smaller hugelkulture area inside the garden area with very small pieces.  The plan was to chop trunks into logs and then pile them in the clearing north of the drive.  This will be our 2017-2018 wood pile.  Or maybe we’ll keep it for even later.  We have 2 cords of the wood pulled from the south clearing in 2012 that is ready to burn any time so we may let this age longer.

We headed next to the east side of the clearing to cull trees for allowing sunlight to the garden area and for a space to place the 750 gallon water tank.  We will be pulling water from the south roof of the Harn above the arctic entrance and screened porch. The guttering will allow for catch of this water and we’ll run a channel over to the storage tank from there, so we want it to be pretty close.  This water will be used for the garden and outside plants. We ended up cutting a few more trees than we originally planned in this area.  And we had too much process work to finish this weekend, so we’ll be back up soon to get that work completed.

We did a few last minute tasks and headed for home back at Mom & Tom’s.  I was so lucky to have Thumper join us this morning.  He was in his regular place at the end of the drive, thundering away for me throughout the day.  He thumped just as we were leaving and I thanked him and told him we’ll be back soon.  There is much more to be done but being at the Harn also provides a relaxation that I get nowhere else.  It is a joy to be there.

And what a joy to be home! When I asked Mom if she & Tom wanted to join us for Pizza at the Depot, she said, “Of course!  It’s Pi Day!”  Se we all went out for some good pi(e).

Happy Pi Day to you all!

 

I made goat cheese!!

Tags

cooperation, family, simplicity, sustainability

What a weekend!  Our friends in Bemidji have a farm homestead and they occasionally like to take a family vacation which means we get to Farm-sit.  This was a full weekend of adventure.  We made a lot of mistakes which will be recognizable to experienced farm people right away but, as noobs who do not have goats or dogs, we were taken by surprise.  It was also full of fun and happy surprises that really made it special.

Our first mistake was unavoidable as it is winter and Friday was a work day.  We arrived after dark.  It’s been such a long time since we’ve done this that 1) we’d forgotten there were outside lights we could have turned on to light up the yard and 2) several of the animals had moved or were new.  Once we had opened the door to let the dogs out, we unloaded our gear into the house.  Then we found some wind up flashlights in the drawer in the mud room and we headed out to get the chores done.  [Note: We realized later that Paul’s videos, also made after dark, were actually pretty representative but we’d watched them the previous day so were doing our best to remember as we trundled through the dark.]  The first thing was giving water to the horses, which was uneventful.  We weren’t worried that we didn’t see any horses.  We were just glad to have only to fill about 4 5-gallon buckets to refill their trough and were happy Sara and Paul had left a big hay bale in the feeder so we didn’t have to throw hay.  As we finished this task, we were amazed with the brilliant stars and stopped for a pause to enjoy the night sky.

Next we went to get water for the ducks, who were shut in the greenhouse. The first instance of cuteness was that Gracie, one of the three black labs, had to get a drink from the water spigot as I filled the bucket of water for the ducks and bunny.  She would repeat this over and over and it was adorable.  The ducks had food so we just had to fill the water bowls and gather eggs.  Sara had warned us of the “fake” eggs that they leave in the nests.  And as I went to gather eggs, I just couldn’t tell the difference between the fakes and the real ones.  I didn’t know how many fakes there were so kept second guessing and finally ended up taking all but two into the house.  I figured if I had any fakes inside I could just return them to the ducks later.  Sara texted me later saying the fakes were larger but the duck eggs were pretty huge too.  There were some I collected that seemed just as big as the big ones I left outside.  (These below will not allow this carton to close.)

After the ducks, we took care of the rabbit which was the easiest job, the only hard part being pulling back the chicken wire roll to gain access.  The bunny is adorable and very happy to have fresh, liquid water and a handful of food pellets.  The chickens were good for the day so we headed next to the goat care, which is where the real fun began.  In the dark, we walked straight past the hay bales on our left as we looked to the right at the deck where it was supposed to be.  However, we happened upon some straw which I remembered using with the goats a year before so we grabbed a couple flakes and headed to the boy goat quarters, figuring milking would be the last thing we did.  We stuffed the hay bags with the flakes and saw no evidence of goats.  The previous year, I’d gone in the male goat quarters with the kids (who seemed not excited about entering) and I’d survived.  Seeing no goats, I decided to go in to get their water, now an ice bucket, busted up and re-filled.  The entryway to the area was quite tricky as one side of the door is tied in place and the other side is tied in place at the bottom and has a bungie tie holding the top of the chicken wire.  I unhooked the bungie and stepped up and over, contorting myself through with a definite lack of finesse.  Thank goodness Dan was holding the light so I could see what I was doing.  After getting things with the water in order, I headed back out to take care of milking the two girl goats.

First we headed to the shed for the grain which we knew we would need to distract the ladies as we milked.  [I missed an obvious sign that would later become clear.  Paul had said something about running out of grain for the goats but from what I could see, there was about a third of a 50 gallon barrel and another half barrel of feed.  This first red flag did not deter me from my task of getting these goats milked.]

As we looked over the female goat pen, we tried to come up with a game plan.  I went inside and looked around while Dan waited outside.  I kept getting bitten in the butt by someone – turns out it was mostly Milkshake.  After making an assessment of the area, I figured we had to get one of the two milking goats into the shed, up on the stanchion, with grain dish in place and then wash the udder, work in the bucket and get the milking done.  Having only two hands to hold the grain, the bucket for milking, the water bottle for the rag to wash the udder, the aforementioned rag, and the second bucket of grain (for the second milking goat) was making things tough.  Danny had his own battles trying to give me enough light with the windup flashlight (which, as you may have guessed, meant frequent turning which required both hands) while also fighting the rush of the other 5 goats, the second milker and 4 younger gals, who also were trying to get to the grain I was juggling.  The first milker is meanwhile looking at me like I was crazy asking her to jump up on this stanchion in the shed.  [This was red flag number two.  The goats, Sara told me, were readily jumping up for milking.  This was not going as well as I had envisioned.]

Dan eventually pulled the shed door closed to keep the other 5 goats out while I finagled the rest of the process after eventually getting the first milker in place.  Dan had meanwhile injured his back fighting the goats and was now writhing in pain as he tried to hold closed the door. [At one point he yelled out, “I think we’re gonna have kabobs soon!!”] The goats outside are making his job tougher as they keep biting at his gloved fingers on the hand holding the door closed.  I milked the first goat, re-learning the process which I’d only done a couple times previously and had never done alone.  I managed pretty well, and was able to get a good amount of milk before the grain supply was devoured by Angel.  I let her go back outside and we managed to get Milkshake, and only Milkshake, into the shed for round 2. (Though it sounds easy, it took quite a while as everyone wanted to bum rush the shed for the grain during the transition.) She also looked at me like I was crazy, fought longer to get up on the stanchion but finally surrendered and made her way up.  [Red flag #3 ignored.]  I was now milking better, remembering the squeeze from top to bottom of the teat.  Though Milkshake was much more sensitive and several times tried lifting her leg, I managed to keep her from kicking over the bucket as I milked.  Again, I didn’t feel I’d done a thorough job but at this point, we’d been at chores for over two hours and I finally let her go as well.  We ended up with about 3 pints of milk and I knew I’d at least kept them from being too uncomfortable for the evening.  I’d try again in the morning.  With some light.

We’d managed to lose the udder rag along the way.  First, we’d lost it when I put the water bottle and rag down with the grain and milking bucket outside the pen as Dan and I considered our options.  When he brought the water bottle and bucket over I asked, “Where is the rag?”  “What rag?” he says.  Turns out Hunter, the youngest of the black labs, had decided it was a toy. [This should have been a sign for me to watch Hunter moving forward but I failed to catch on to this.  I know dog owners everywhere are like, “What is she, NEW?!?”  Yes.  I am.]  We see Hunter in the backwash of the light shining from the house, rag dangling from his mouth.  Danny goes to him and secures the rag bringing it to me.  Once inside and finally getting the first goat washed down, I tuck the rag between my knees.  Yes, I have gloves and rag between the knees as I struggle to milk, prevent a loss of the bucket and try to see in the half light of Dan’s wind-up flashlight.  When the goat switch happened, I looked down for the rag to wash the second udder and… it’s nowhere.  I am sure that one of the goats grabbed it and, very likely, are it.  We found it nowhere all weekend long.  I was glad to have managed to not lose either glove.

After finally finishing the chores about 8:30 PM, who knows, maybe later, we headed inside to make some dinner and relax with the cats and dogs.  I strained the milk, washed the milking bucket and duck eggs gathered and prepared to make some fresh scrambled eggs.  Each time I banged an egg against the counter I was sure it would be a fake.  They were large with very hard shells. But each time… voila! A real egg!  We enjoyed a delicious dinner and started to relax.  After being inside a while, we realized we were short by one cat and texted Sara asking about Gatito, the calico.  Apparently she’d left one day last October and never came back.  While this sucks (Gatito was my favorite of the two because she was really lovey and let you pet her forever), I too lost a cat this way once and it was the easiest loss I’d ever had, as far as cats are concerned.  I grieved more easily once I realized he was not coming home and could always wonder with a bit of hope that he was out living a fat cat life.  The one cat remaining was the GIGANTIC orange tabby named Lucky.  Yes, he’s so big that he tripped the DNR cameras once and the DNR guys thought they had a mountain lion until Paul, a DNR officer, told his buddies, “Nope, that’s just my cat.”  The camera was low, so when he came through, Lucky looked even bigger than he is.  He’s not nearly as big as a cougar, but he is big.  And he was more lovey-dovey than ever!  He was immediately in Danny’s lap, rubbing and purring and snuggling.  It was hilarious!  He gave me a bit of love but Danny got the lion’s share.

Finally in bed late, I only had to get up a couple times for the dogs to head outside so got a bit of sleep.  I woke up about eight, knowing Dan was really feeling his back, I figured I’d get as much of the chore work done as I could.  Maybe I could even milk the goats on my own!  Yes, I was awake but was really dreaming on this one…

Heading outside into the light of day, I had multiple realizations and knew, as much as we felt like we’d accomplished the previous night, we had made many mistakes.  We had certainly worked hard, had tried our best, pushing the limits of frustration with the goats to get the job done, but we are not seasoned and had made many rookie mistakes.  And I had more to make today…

The first thing I saw coming around the house were the large bales of hay sitting at the fence, yes, near the deck but not visible if you are walking between them and the deck, looking at the deck.  The farmers were laughing paragraphs ago (or maybe just shaking their heads in disbelief) but I quickly realized: Hay is not Straw and Straw is not Hay.  I realized not only had I NOT given the boy goats any food, but I’d also not thrown fresh hay into the manger for the girls either!  In all the frustration of milking, I’d forgotten this completely.  So first thing, I headed to see the boys who were out of their shed and watching my approach.  Frederick was super lovey, rubbing his head on the fence.  I grabbed the bags of straw, still full, though it was obvious they’d tried it…  Goats will eat almost anything but apparently they have to be real hungry to eat straw!  I threw the straw into the girls bedding area and filled the bags quickly.  I noticed thankfully there was still hay in the manger so felt a bit less guilty.  I had ducked into the chicken coop to see if they were OK (since we hadn’t checked on them at all the night before and grabbed the one egg – they are a bunch of freeloaders – and tucked it into the egg carton I’d brought from the house). Frederick was so happy to see me coming with the hay bags and, I dumped the egg carton into the 5 gallon feed bucket as I tucked inside the pen to break up and re-fill the water.  Frederick and I head butted each other and I gave both boys apologies and love.

I left the pen and looked down realizing the egg carton was gone. What happened?  Well, it was either Hunter or Gracie (Jake wouldn’t do that) who had stolen my egg carton.  I found the carton but no egg.  I yelled at the dogs, then threw the rest of the hay in to the girls and went to reload the wheelbarrow.  I threw a bit more hay and then looking at the pen area in the light of day realized I could close all the other goats into the feed side of the pen and isolate one milker.  I could do this myself!  I pulled Milkshake into the shed side and closed off the gate.  I didn’t know until later but Danny was now up and watching this unfold through the living room window.  What he saw, that I didn’t, as I walked toward the shed, was the goats behind me already sticking their heads through the gate figuring a way to come after the grain.  Sure enough, by the time I got into the shed and turned around to encourage Milkshake to get up on the stanchion, here’s a baby goat staring at me through the door.  Luckily Dan had gotten his boots on and was heading out to help.

I was in fact able to do it the milking myself with Dan holding the gate closed keeping all the herd out of my hair.  Now they were biting his pants!  [We initially tried it the other way with one milker on the manger side of the pen (since all the goats were now ahead of me and would not leave the shed side…), but that was just not going to work and it’s just another long and unsuccessful story.]  So, while I thought chores would be shorter, in fact, they were just as long or longer than the previous evening.  At least I felt like I had gotten more milk from the girls giving them a real milking and relief.

I was near exhaustion after another hard fought battle of chores.  But I was also feeling like a champ when I had almost two whole quarts of milk filtered.  We made GF pancakes and then I made some goat cheese with the fridge full of milk from the previous week.

This was a fun process and new for me but the recipe was simple: Heat the milk to 150° then add some vinegar and let it sit for an hour.  Then, put the whole shebang through the cheese cloth, and you have cheese!!  It was pretty exciting to make my first goat cheese knowing I’d been a part of the whole process of making it.  I made three types: simple chives with salt, garlic, and red & white pepper w/parsley, turmeric and white pepper.  And later that evening we found it to be pretty tasty!

But first we were heading out to meet our friends Megan and Ryan for dinner.  They’d also done goat sitting for Sara and Paul and my first question was going to be, “How do you milk the goats?”  I just knew I was missing something but could not for my life figure out what.  Sara couldn’t possibly spend two hours twice a day taking care of this farm.  In order to save some time with evening chores in the dark, we put the ducks away in the greenhouse getting them all set for food and water, made sure the horses were good, I even through them some fresh hay (though they had some remaining, I figured we’d make that hay last).  [I think I was just so excited about hay that I wanted everyone to have some!]  I also refilled the boy goats’ hay bags (with hay this time!) and set them aside so all we had to do was hang them later in the dark.

At the Becida Bar (best place in town for food! – you will only get this joke if you know how big Becida is – it’s the only place in town), we met with Megan and Ryan and I asked my question.  Ryan says, “Well, you have the grain and the milk bucket and you put the grain in first.”  I stopped him and said, “No, start from the beginning, how do you get the milking goat isolated and keep the other goats from interfering?”  He says, “Well, you let the milking goat out of the pen and she runs right to the milking trailer, but you definitely want to have the grain in there before you let her out.”  I am dumbfounded.  “Milking Trailer?!?” I say, “Are you fucking kidding me?” (Quote marks mean I have to say what I really said.) “Where is that?”  Turns out, that horse trailer in the middle of the animal area?  It’s a milking trailer!!  I text Sara, “So, Megan says you have a milking trailer.”  Now the text she sent Friday night makes perfect sense.  In reply to my asking her, in the midst of figuring out the process, “What is the trick to get Milkshake up for milking?” She replied simply, “Grain”  Yeah, like I wasn’t trying that!  And now it made perfect sense to her how insane I must have been.  Trying to convince the goats to do something that was now foreign to them and actually succeeding in getting the milking done (though wanting to almost kill the goats in the process (especially the one that kept biting my ass)) was a real miracle.  [I did take some pride in being able to get all this done the hard way.  And I was able to inform Ryan of the proper technique for accessing the male goat pen which had to date eluded him.]

As much as I was so ticked at Danny and I having struggled for so long the previous 24 hours, I was greatly relieved for the evening’s chore round.  By doing a lot of pre-work and knowing we could try the milking station, I was sure we’d be well under the average chore time of more than 2 hours.  Indeed we were. We were done with everything in less than 45 minutes.  Since I could handily milk each lady in peace all by myself, Dan was free to handle all the other work.  I milked each girl completely and was so happy to have had an easy time of it.  The next morning I was able to allow Dan to sleep in and did all the chores solo.  I was lucky that it was warm enough that the water just needed refills as ice had not formed.  I can’t recall how long it took but under an hour for sure.  I even refilled the hay wheelbarrow so the folks relieving us for Sunday night would be all set.

So was it all worth it?  Yes!  Sara left a nice gift bag for Dan and me and we got lots of love from the animals.  The best moments were with Lucky,  After I’d thrown hay for the horses Saturday morning, he came running up to me and so I went to pick him up and he jumped up on my shoulder wrapping around my neck and snuggling against my head, purring like crazy.  He rode around on my shoulders all around the house as I walked to the bedroom window to show Danny and around the deck area and up to the back door.  Lucky did this shoulder trick a few more times and every time it was wonderful.  Then, this morning, I found him lying on the bed all stretched out and I laid down by him and put my head to his.  He snuggled with me, putting him paws up on my hands and arms as I pet him and then he licked my face like it was a big ice cream cone!  He also jumped into bed with us in the mornings when he came in from outside and snuggled a bunch.  So, yeah, I learned a TON of stuff, realized how much I don’t know, and had a bunch of fun.  I’ll sign up again in a heartbeat.

Oh, anticipating the question most will ask…  There are 4 horses, 29 ducks, 1 rabbit, 8 goats, 20 chickens, 3 dogs, 2 fish, and 1 cat.

Differences

Tags

being nice, communication, cooperation

This week has been a week of looking at Differences.  The topic has come up several times as the Inclusion Network and Alexandria Technical and Community College present Created Equal: America’s Civil Rights Struggle Film & Discussion Series.  The first part of Abolitionists (a PBS Documentary series) was presented Thursday at Grand Arbor.  The remaining events will be held from 6-9 PM at Grand Arbor (4403 Pioneer Road SE in Alexandria, MN) on January 20^th, 21^st, 25^th & 28^th.

The Same or Different?

Watching the scenes from Abolitionists was disturbing, taking me back to the 1980’s when, as a college student, one of my elective classes focused on the PBS series Eyes on the Prize which reviewed the Civil Rights Struggle from 1954-1965. I remember being shocked that people in my own country, in the not so distant past, were capable of such acts against humanity.  I was embarrassed by what I saw.  I felt appalled to be white.  What could justify such inhumane treatment of people, simply due to the color of their skin which showed their “difference”?  Cruel. Hateful. Unbelievable.  And I was PISSED OFF that I never learned of any of this growing up as a child.  Why was no one talking about these atrocities?  How had I not been aware?

As events unfold on the news these days, many are wondering again at the atrocious treatment of people of color.  Black women dying in police custody, black men being shot in cold blood as they walk away from an officer, and the list goes on. And sadly, though many of us won’t believe it, things have been this way all along.  It’s just now, in a day of readily available technology, and an internet on which to spread this information, that we are able to learn about that in which we are not directly involved.  And we wonder why people of color are still angry. Hmmm.

Our discussion during the film study Thursday concluded in large part that the issue is not skin color or sex or age, though we all voiced examples of how each of these can create situations of difference.  The real issue is power in those who believe they are superior.  And it often comes down to who has the ability to enforce his place of power.  Men have long been able to overpower most women ~ it’s a matter of size.  Immigrants are often at disadvantage due to poverty, language barriers and a lack of connections.  They are often overpowered by natives… though this country showed, that is not always the case.  Those with money, weapons, power and brute force can and often do take.  Take charge, take resources, take advantage, and even take innocence.  But it’s more than just power.  Whether power is used to take advantage or abuse is a result of character.  And often abuse of power is based in fear. The discussion shared at Grand Arbor this past week was rich with evaluation of power, difference, and character.  Even those characters historically seen as benevolent or beneficial did not get off without being held accountable!  It was quite thought provoking and I encourage those who can to join us at the next event the evening of Wednesday the 20^th.

As I spoke with friends about difference this week, so many stories arose.

Some shared about being the object of discrimination and comprehending how that feels to be the one hated for the color of your skin.  I remember being the only white student at a Society of Black Engineers meeting and comprehending the daunting feeling of being the sole person who was different on that easily observed trait of skin color.  I didn’t attend again… though I’m not sure now if it was not wanting to face that feeling or not wanting to feel like an invader.  I know how important it can be to have space where there is unity that feels safe.  I recall 12-step meetings being split into male and female, especially when new people would arrive for a first meeting.  There was controversy about this among the group but many, especially the women, felt it was important as we knew how hard it was to share openly, to be vulnerable, in a mixed sex group.  This was especially difficult if one had been the victim of rape or abuse by the opposite sex.  I imagine today this gets even more complicated as there is such a widening understanding of gender compared with where we were in the last century.

One friend noted a recent posting on FB about being non-racist or anti-racist: https://www.facebook.com/theguardian/videos/10153870551066323/?theater

After which I found this… also quite powerful: https://www.facebook.com/OccupyDemocrats/videos/1042823995810654/?theater

Some of my friends noted how even simple differences in how we interact with the world can create difficulty in relationships.  If one is more talkative and one more quiet, if one is more organized and one more cluttered, if one likes a disciplined approach to resolution and one prefers a chaotic and creative way, all these can make working together successfully more of a challenge.  Aren’t we all more comfortable with our own ways?  Am I the only one who likes being “right”?  I read recently in a new book Living Your Yoga: finding the spiritual in everyday life by Judith Hanson,

“How human of me to want to be right.  How human of you to resist being wrong.”

But I’ve learned that my “right” idea isn’t always the best idea and often, it is more interesting and enlightening to see all sides of an issue.  I’ve learned that our perspectives of the world are skewed by our experience, understanding and position.  And since each of us is an individual, our views of the world are all different, in many ways.  And that is what brings a lot of the joy and beauty to this world.  But, yes, much pain and conflict too.

Yet some shared about experiences of finding hope in situations where people with obvious and potentially overpowering differences were able to transcend them and find joy and brotherhood.  Instead of focusing on the differences, the focus was on the similarities.  Instead of seeing the difference in race or culture, it was acknowledged that everyone was present for a joyful meal and celebration.  When the focus was on the love and comradery, the differences fell aside becoming inconsequential.  What if we could all do this?  Look for the commonality and the shared purpose rather than the ways we worship a higher power or the clothes we wear or how we speak.  Aren’t we all flesh and blood?  All striving to find love and acceptance?  All wanting the best world for ourselves and our children?  All hoping to have enough?

And here is where the fear often arises.  What if I don’t have enough? So we hoard for our family… for our tribe.  We don’t share as much as we could.  What if I run out!?!  It takes me to thoughts of an old scripture (yeah, I had to look this up but I recall it from an epiphany had during my days as a Presbyterian):

For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? And why are you worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you?   Matthew 6: 25-30

I’m not so sure about humans being “worth much more” than birds or flowers.  Let’s face it, there’s a high possibility that we will destroy this planet’s ability to support mammals in the next 150 years but the trees will likely happily thrive once we’re gone.  And my preference today is to the idea that the Universe provides all we need… too much negative experience with organized religion.  But God or Universe, Allah or Buddha, Magic, Mother Nature or Random Chance, I find that I am often in possession of all I need, in fact, usually much more than I need.  But that’s a topic for another day.

Though we may be important enough for the Universe to provide, sometimes we also need to realize how inconsequential we can be.  One friend this week shared that he had bullied a girl in grade school and carried guilt with him for years.  At a high school reunion decades later, he sought her out to apologize, only to find that she didn’t remember him!  How often have we carried our own baggage of this sort?  Thinking our actions were so impactful and important, only to find that no one else recalled that thing we said or did?  Many times I have been shocked, in hindsight, by something I did and I wondered how the other person would ever forgive me.  As with my friend above, there are many remembrances that I’ve carried in dread while the other person was oblivious to the concern.

Alternatively, we sometimes do not realize the power we have in the lives of others.  I am certain I have been oblivious in saying or doing something that, to the other, was abhorrent.  While I have no recollection of the event, for them it is a recurring nightmare.  On the other hand, I have also been unaware of times I did or said things, oblivious to their impact, only to have someone tell me years later how important I’d been in their lives.  And I think of the many people who have impacted my life by little things said or done.

So what is to be done?  Should we worry about all we say and do, hoping we have no ill effect?  Or is there something to be said for the idea that we should not worry what others think of us?

I believe there is a middle ground.  Though we may work to live without harming others, inevitably, there will be some who see what we do as harming.  So we can be aware and open to discussion when these things arise.  Rather than denying that we have hurt someone when we are accused, we can ask for more input.  If they are hurt, it likely has more to do with them than us, but our willingness to listen and walk through the situation, seeing it from many sides, may bring the other to a place of understanding which dispels his hurt and anger.

In opening up to review our differences in perspective, we can come to a better understanding of each other.  We can begin to see the world through the eyes of another and help them to see a new way as well.  Each of us can come to a new perspective, more fully informed.  As long as we meet in love, share in hope and listen with an ear for understanding.

Live in Community and Live on Less

Tags

communication, cooperation, living local, Volunteering

As I reflect on last week’s blog, I realize that Volunteering makes us a Community.  So this week’s blog is about Community in general and Dancing Rabbit EcoVillage in particular.

Volunteering is the ultimate exercise in democracy.  You vote in elections once a year, but when you volunteer, you vote every day about the kind of community you want to live in.

Having moved in the last year, I am newly familiar with seeing the differences in Communities.  There are many things I love about Alexandria, but also many I miss from my old community in central Indiana, Noblesville.  And spending some time last year at Dancing Rabbit EcoVillage, an Intentional Community, gave even more insight to the concept.  So what is the definition of Community?

com·mu·ni·ty (kəˈmyo͞onədē)  noun

• A group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common.  “Minnesota’s Scandinavian community”  “Dancing Rabbit’s Intentional Community”  synonyms:  group, body, set, circle, clique, faction
• A feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals.  “the sense of community that being on a political campaign can provide”

There are many communities in my grander scale Community.  There is the Cherry Street Bookstore community, the DFL community, the Friends of the Library community, the Douglas County Fair community, the various and sundry Church communities, the Local Food community, the Local Music community, the Local Theatre community.  There are even further sub-communities like the Quad A Theatre community and the Theatre L’Homme Dieu community.  Even our Family is a little community.  And our Communities are like little Families… or sometimes big Families!

A Community is a place we can find support, love, guidance and criticism.  All of these make us into the person we are becoming as each of us changes every day with new experience and perspective.  A compassionate and mature Community can do this in an organized and productive way but all Communities do it to one extent or another.  Our relationships with those in our Community play a part in the person each of us is and how we each change as we progress through life on this big rock called Earth.

Community gives us a chance to try things and grow, determine our likes and dislikes and feel our way forward on so many aspects of life.  We may be a part of a community for a long time or a short while.  We may become vocal and active or participate in more subtle ways.  And we get gifts and challenges along the way.

I have been a part of so many communities and I only wish I had time and energy to keep in touch more with those from my past and to commit to more going forward.  I think because I love people and I love learning.  It’s a wonderful experience to BE with people, doing things we believe in and living out our values.  And being a part of Community means we can live on less because we have more people on whom we can rely.

I can bounce ideas off my community friends that help me figure out life so I don’t need as much from doctors or therapists or lawyers.  I can have a potluck with community friends and enjoy a dinner buffet while only having to make one dish.  I can count on my crafter community to provide stash for projects so we can all make awesome stuff without each having to buy the tools, materials and whatnot for a given craft.  Mom counted on her neighbor to help spread her driveway gravel with his Bobcat.  Working together and sharing resources means we all can live more fully with less effort and expense.

And relying on Community for entertainment allows me to live on less money but still live BIG.  The local music is typically free, as long as you are enjoying the offerings from the establishment providing the band.  I also rely on the businesses in my Community to provide support for local groups to come in for free shows enjoyed by the Community at large. They get advertising, name recognition and appreciation and we get good music. Local theatre is much more affordable than that of the big cities but it’s equally as enjoyable. And I’ve enjoyed volunteering my time as an usher so the shows are free in exchange for my offer to help! Alexandria Area High School is another wonderful place for inexpensive or free entertainment and it gives kids a chance to perform, honing their skills and knowledge.  Community allows for so many win-win solutions.

Summer show at the Maritime Gardens in Alexandria, MN

Danny (aka Porkchop) and the Rev of Reverend Raven and the Chain Smokin’ Alter Boys

http://www.reverendraven.com/

When I was at Dancing Rabbit (DR), I was able to enjoy the musical skills of people in that community just by being present.  After the potluck, someone would grab a guitar and play for us.  Maybe someone else would bring a drum and others would sing.  Members joined in for weekly sing-a-long nights creating our own entertainment and appreciation for each other.  Children often would provide amazing fun just by being kids; I recall a mud pit that became a playground right outside the door of the Gnome Dome where I stayed.  What joy!  And when a lost friend was celebrated at her graveside, the joining of voices was a sacred gift of our own making.  A bittersweet but still joyful remembrance.

Intentional Communities often create a kind of Community that seems like one large family.  People live in close enough proximity that there are many occasions for interaction.  Unlike most suburban neighborhoods where people drive into their garage after work and may never see the neighbors, at the EcoVillage, the only cars are in the co-op building so travel through the village is done on foot or by bike.  It’s easy to find a moment to say hello, share a trouble or give a helping hand.  It’s easy to stay in touch with people’s lives.  And kids have the availability of multiple grown-ups to help them learn and sooth their falls.  Those without children still have an ability to “parent” as agreed upon by the members of the Community.  There are “brothers” and “sisters” all around.  Of course, this can also get testy… most families feud at one moment or another, right?

To preserve the Community, at DR, there is a strong support network of committees to get things done and a focus on Non-Violent Communication (NVC) and other techniques to help keep the Community talking and to resolve issues as they arise.  It was very interesting to be a part of this open communication group.  At first it seems confrontational but then you realize people are simply comfortable with expressing themselves in a clear and timely manner.  Stating needs and setting expectations and sharing feelings is very functional but it felt strange for me, perhaps particularly since I was coming from a Midwestern culture where it isn’t always encouraged to share so openly.  It was refreshing to be able to listen and share in a way that wasn’t about blame but about understanding and finding solutions or simply comforting, depending on what was needed.

At DR people share common areas and tools: a common house for meetings, computers, bathrooms, mailboxes and showers; several kitchens which support 3-30 people; common grounds for orchards, swimming and recreation; a car/truck co-op; a village grid for electricity.  As such, many of them live on fewer resources than a typical American.  When you share common space, tools and activities like cooking and eating, you end up with less waste.  Many American houses have a living room, family room and dining room.  But much of this space remains unused the majority of the time.  In fact, with both parents working and kids in multiple activities, many American houses are empty for the majority of each day!

The people of Dancing Rabbit (aka Rabbits) are working to show that it is possible to live on a lot less than the average American and they are succeeding, typically living on about 10% of a typical American with regard to fuel and electricity via renewable energy, ecological cooking and sustainable transportation, heating and hot water.  They live on a small fraction of the water used by a typical American by using rainwater catchment, cisterns and humanure toilets.  The building techniques they use require materials with minimal embodied energy and the use of local, natural, sustainable resources as much as possible.

Rabbits grow a lot of their own food and I found it to be a lovely life for the three weeks I stayed in their Visitor Program last summer.  It was great exposure to natural building, NVC, vegan eating (much better than I expected it to be), local money and consensus decision-making.  I swam naked in the pond, peed in the grass, enjoyed campfires including a Full Moon ceremony (Thanks, Dee and Hassan!), got my hands dirty and even milked a goat (Thanks, Mae!!).  The joy I keep with me today is that I made a bunch of new friends and have so much more fun reading their weekly blog now that I know so many of them. Check out the blog here: http://www.marchhareblog.com/

I recommend that anyone who’d like to get a taste of living sustainably and learning about Community make a trip to Dancing Rabbit.  It’s quite an impressive living community, reportedly one of the top 5 EcoVillages in the world and it’s right here in the Midwest.  If you have interest, I encourage you to attend a Visitor Session or Open House.  And, if you are so drawn, you’re in luck, as their annual open house this year is September 12, 2015 from 1-4 PM.

See more at: http://www.dancingrabbit.org/about-dancing-rabbit-ecovillage/

As hard as it may sometimes get, as complex as all human relations can be, I believe that living in the various Communities that I have chosen to make a part of my world truly makes me a better person.  I’m still growing and learning and I hope that never ends.  It’s a joy to see where life will lead me next.  Whether it is making a connection with new friends, giving of my time and being rewarded with entertainment or learning something new, being involved in Community brings wonderful opportunity.  While I need less to live when I work in cooperation with others, it’s ironic that I also find my life is so much more fulfilling.